Monologue Monday: Why Am I Still Single?!?!?

***Side note*** Last Friday I was telling you all how excited I was about the post below. I was so pumped about it and just so ready to share it with ya’ll that I almost posted it then. Instead of posting it though, I just decided to tell ya’ll about it here. From that post, I was contacted by AaronRose24 saying that he had recently done a post about being single too. I was so curious that I immediately stopped everything that I was doing, jumped on my laptop and searched for the video that he was talking about. As I watched it, my stomach dropped L. We were saying a couple of the same things (but some things were different), but still I definitely didn’t want to seem like I was reiterating his work because I respect the stuff that other people do (even though I had never seen the video before now). So, what’s a girl to do?!?!? I sent him a message, realized the below post is just me being true to who I am and decided not to change a thing about it, and then I reminded myself how excited I was before I saw his video. That said, I’m posting what God put on my heart to post. (You can find Aaron’s video here if you are interested). Just wanted to let ya’ll know what went down and how I almost didn’t post this, but it just really spoke to me so I had to. Check it out and leave a comment below to let me know what you think about the topic or if you can relate.*****

Monologue Monday: Why Am I Still Single?!?!?

 

She’s so perfect!♥ She has it all together♥ They make such a great couple! ♥ OMG…Did you hear??? So and so got engaged♥ Why does everything always work out for her? ♥ Always a bridesmaid…never a bride♥ Why am I still single?!?!

Have any of these thoughts ever crossed your mind?

We are very open with each other around here, so I have no problem admitting that there have been points in my life where I was just a mess and I was wondering why me? I’m seemingly doing all the right things, I’m saving myself for marriage and trying to be a respectable young lady…blah, blah, blah (and I’m not mocking anybody who is currently feeling this way, because I can relate- these were my exact words and sentiments).

But the honest truth is that I’m happy that it wasn’t me (then). First off, I’m not the jealous or envious type of girl, and even those rare moments that it tries to rear its ugly head, I cut it off at the root quickly and don’t allow myself to entertain those type of thoughts… so that wasn’t it. (I love telling myself to get it together!)

I get really excited for other people when they are happy or are doing really well in their lives. It’s cool to see other people living their dreams and enjoying life….you only live once.

Just because someone else is doing really well should have no bearings on your own happiness, so we have to learn to rejoice with other people when they are rejoicing…your time is coming and it’s going to be just for you.

But no, that wasn’t my problem. My problem was me allowing my mind to wonder ‘if I am doing everything that I’m supposed to be doing, why isn’t this happening for me? I’m attractive, fun and exciting (and I genuinely say that humbly…I’m just sharing the thoughts that were going through my head at the time J), and I want to be in a relationship and I want to share my life with someone, so why hasn’t it happened for me?’

Ya’ll, everything happens for a reason.

The truth is that I am SO grateful that it didn’t happen when I wanted it to happen. I became so engrossed in feeling sorry for myself and allowed my emotions to wreak havoc on me that I forgot about a huge part of that equation: ME.

Being single is NOT a curse.

It is during this time that you get to focus on yourself and on making you a better person. Get to know yourself and do something to make a difference in somebody else’s life. Stop thinking ‘why me’ (like it’s a sickness or an illness) and start living your dreams.

Find out who you are. When the time comes, not only will you be ready and a real treasure to whoever wins your heart, but you will love yourself and will have gotten the opportunity to do the things that you wanted to do in the process.

Try to remember that once you become a team with someone else, it’s no longer just about you but now you have to consider the other person and their desires as well. So PLEASE, take full advantage of this time to focus solely on you!

As for myself, even though every once in while the thought does cross my mind of wondering when, I just take that thought, place it back in God’s hands, and keep doing me. He knows what He’s doing and His timing is perfect.

That said, I do silently whisper to Him from time to time ‘Lord, please don’t let me be a thirty year old virgin’! Haha, lol J. (Not saying that there is anything wrong with that at all for those of you who are still out there, keep up the amazing work♥, I’m just saying that I pray that that’s not a part of the plan for me). Nevertheless, if it is, I will do so proudly and confidently…..

I’m starting to ramble now, but the point of this post is just to say do you and do you confidently. Don’t confine yourself to man’s timetable for when things should be done in your life.

Focus on being the best you that you can be and the guy will come along, just don’t think about it so much. In due time, God will give you the desires of your heart and if you remain patient, I can almost promise you that it will have been worth the wait.

And trust me, I can tell you all these things because I am in the same boat as you. Honestly, I am happy that I’m still single at the moment and that I haven’t committed myself to a relationship, because when it does happen hopefully I can take you along for the journey and you can see just how faithful God is.

Just sit back, relax and enjoy this beautiful ride.

The next time that a friend tells you that she’s met this great guy, or that she’s engaged, or getting married, rejoice with her (and really mean it). Your time is coming sooner than you think. Enjoy your life where it is right now though first.

In short, just love yourself and everything else will fall into place.

-Virgin Monologuez