Monologue Monday: Blogging While Single and 30

I am so excited about today’s Monologue Monday’s guest blogger!

Her name is Jessie, and she’s the creator of the site Blogging While Single and 30. She’s also extremely nice and very kindhearted. I stumbled upon her site a while ago, and I was instantly drawn into her personality and her story telling abilities. After stalking checking out her site for a while, I finally decided to just ask her if she would mind sharing her story here and she happily obliged. (Needless to say I was over the moon, but that’s just because she’s so fabulous!)

Anyway, enough of me trying to tell you about her…. I tend to ramble from time to time…sorry about thatJ…. but her site and her story speak for themselves.

I will add one more thing though…when I told her how thankful I was for her sharing her personal story with us she simply stated “My testimony is not for my journal. It’s for the world”. She even shared a personal poem that she wrote in hopes that it might speak to someone else who might be going through the some of the same things. If that’s not one of the most selfless and compassionate attitudes, I don’t know what is!

(You should really check out her site… if you haven’t done so already!!!)

Here is her story in her own words:

“November”

***Disclaimer*** This poem was written when I was a teenager. This was my view at that time.

 

November was the month it came,

All the temptation; all the pain

Nights so lovely; nights so sweet

Days so dark; soul so week

November was the month it came,

Shattered my heart; made tears of vain

Nights sinful, full of evil

It was okay to the world, but in the Bible illegal

November was the month it was gone

Took my right; left my wrong

Night’s full of passion, nights so uncommon

Took my childishness; In its place left a woman

I lost my virginity at 16. It was Thanksgiving Day. Why that day? I wanted it to be special. Never mind that it would have been more special to wait and give myself to my husband. In my mind, he was going to be my husband. In my mind, we were going to live happily ever after. In my mind, I had found the one! Hmmmm, not so much. That same person that said he loved me to the moon and back cheated on me, had a baby by someone else, hit me, talked bad to me, and so on and so on. It was hard for me to grasp or understand what love truly was. What it truly meant and what it felt like.

Fast forward to now. I know how it feels to be truly loved. God has shown so much grace over the years. He’s allowed me to excel at my job, serve in ministry, and walk in my purpose. That’s love. No matter what I’ve done in the past; He keeps loving me. Through the love He’s shown, I’ve learned to love myself. I’ve learned to respect myself. I’ve learned to not let hurt or shame hinder me. I was able to move on from November and enjoy new seasons.

 

***P.S. Friday, 1 February 2013, starts our “Love Yourself” campaign. Please stop by and join in on the fun. Celebrate yourself!!!

The Beauty of A Woman

For some reason lately I have been a bit tougher on myself than I should be. In those moments I love reminding myself that I…that we all… should celebrate and encourage ourselves and one another, and learn to just enjoy life and take it one day at a time.

Life is not necessarily about the mistakes that we make or the shortcomings that we possess, but about the lessons that we learn and how we overcome in those instances. Just by being us, by living and loving, we are all leaving an imprint; we are all beautiful beings.

The Beauty of a Woman:

The beauty of a woman
isn't in the clothes she wears,
The figure that she carries,
or the way she combs her hair.

The beauty of a woman
must be seen from in her eyes;
Because that's the doorway to her heart,
the place where love resides.

The beauty of a woman
isn't in a facial mole;
But true beauty in a woman,
is reflected by her soul.

It's the caring that she cares to give,
the passion that she shows;
And the beauty of a woman
with passing years only grows.

-Sam Levenson/Audrey Hepburn

You are a Phenomenal Woman- Love Yourself

Often times we may seek the approval of others, but the truth is they will never give us what we want. Your confidence should not come from the validation of others. Look inside yourself and see your worth.

You are an AMAZING person! See yourself as the phenomenal woman that you desire others to see you as. Your worth is priceless- start believing that and demand that others treat you with the respect, dignity, and love that you deserve.

Hold your head up high, tell yourself how beautiful you are both inside and out, and walk through life with confidence and class- You are a Phenomenal Woman- now just start walking it out. I believe in you, now believe in yourself.

 In the words of Maya Angelou:

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion model's size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I'm telling lies.
I say,
It's in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It's the fire in my eyes,
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing in my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can't see.
I say,
It's in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman

Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Now you understand
Just why my head's not bowed.
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It's in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
the palm of my hand,
The need of my care,
'Cause I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

                      -Maya Angelou

Transparency

A friend of mine was recently corresponding with me via email when she said something so real- I literally had an aha moment! (You will meet her in about two weeks when she shares her story with us for Monologue Monday- it really is going to be inspirational and candid so stay tunedJ).

But back to the post… I was asking her if she would mind sharing her story when she responded by saying, “I would love to share my story…there is no power when you aren’t transparent about your past”.

In a society where wearing a mask has become more “real” than being yourself, it takes boldness and honesty to face yourself and to say this is who I am- that was my past, but this is who I have become now.

What type of a people have we become when our “reality” is scripted and the mask that we wear is synonymous with authenticity?

The reason why this was an aha moment for me is because writing this blog is not just inspirational and enjoyable for me as I meet all of you (and I really do LOVE meeting all of you), but it is therapeutic because I am having to face my self and be real with who I have been, who I am now, and who I really want to become in the future.

It’s so easy to persuade people to think that you have it all together, and that everything is picture perfect in your life, but where is the testimony in that? 

The reason why Monologue Monday (and every other part of this blog) is so important and so encouraging is because it is candid and real. What are we hiding from…there is freedom in acknowledging, forgiving, and moving forward.

In the very wise words of Max de Pree:

“We need to give each other the space to grow, to be ourselves, to exercise our diversity. We need to give each other space so that we may both give and receive such beautiful things as ideas, openness, dignity, joy, healing, and inclusion”.

Dare to be Different.... Dare to be YOU

Just Because

Just because I have never done drugs, doesn't mean I'm not cool.
Just because I am a virgin, doesn't make me lame.
Just because I'm not a fighter, doesn't mean I'm weak.
Just because I am not a party girl, doesn't mean I can't hang.
Just because I get good grades, doesn't mean I'm a nerd.
Just because teachers like me, doesn't mean I am teachers pet.
Just because I am not a rebel, doesn't mean I'm scared.
Just because I am quiet, doesn't mean I don't speak up for what I believe in.
Just because I have morals, doesn't make me a good two shoes.
Just because I walk away from trouble, doesn't make me a pushover.
Just because I think before I act, doesn't make me a loser.

I am who I am and this is who I shall forever be. I do not care what others think of me. Like me or not that is your choice. Accept me for who I am.

                                                                                                                - Poem by Angie Flores