Monologue Monday: Who Are You???

“Most people love you for who you pretend to be. To keep their love, you keep pretending - performing. You get to love your pretence. It's true, we're locked in an image, an act - and the sad thing is, people get so used to their image, they grow attached to their masks. They love their chains. They forget all about who they really are. And if you try to remind them, they hate you for it, they feel like you're trying to steal their most precious possession.”
-Jim Morrison 

 

There are going to be some people in life who don’t get you. They aren’t going to understand your personality, they might not appreciate your uniqueness, and they may resent the fact that you are different than them and that you’re ok with that.

Some people don’t like when you stand strong in your beliefs and convictions. As much as we in western societies pride ourselves on our individuality and independence, the reality is that many of us are comfortable as long as those around us fit into our mold.

We think that our friends and associates should act a certain way or behave a certain way (usually in line with us and our ideas), and when that doesn’t happen we have a tendency to distance ourselves from them or to get upset that ‘they are changing’. We may even go as far as calling them “snobbish” or “stuck up” now because they no longer are ok doing or being who we think they should do or be.

When I was in high school and college, several of my “friends” were ok with me as long as they thought that I resembled them and their thought patterns. The moment that I would voice my opinion or go against something that they stood for (i.e. casual sex, drinking, sleeping around, going from club to club with random people, etc), the moment that I became ‘stuck up’ and ‘snobby’.

The truth of the mater is that none of these lies were accurate about me, but in their heads it was a reality because they had an expectation and an idea of who I was supposed to be. When my image and actions didn’t fit that, it was no longer ideal for them.

There are always going to be pressures within our society to act a certain way or to believe a certain thing. The word normal is a reality because it’s what the majority does.

I don’t consider myself a ‘normal’ girl. I love being different and just being me.

Don’t get me wrong, there used to be a point in my life where I was really concerned about what other people thought about me. I wanted to please people and I wanted everyone to just be happy and get along.

That’s not me anymore. In trying to please everybody else, I missed out on being me.

Everybody is going to have an idea or an opinion about who you are or what you should do with your life. The most important thing that you should remember is that you only get one shot at this life…this isn’t a dress rehearsal; it’s the real thing.

If after all was said and done, you look back and you realize you never became who you wanted to be or you never spoke up and voiced your opinion because you wouldn’t fit in or be a part of the majority, then you would have lived your entire life for someone else.

In spite of the pressures of society, we must dare to be different and be firm and brave in who we are and how we want to live our lives.

Nobody but you can be who you are, so don’t waste your life trying to fit someone else’s destiny. Love yourself, and always stand true to what you believe in. You never know the impact that you are having on those around you.

-Virgin Monologuez

(P.S. I’ll be back with more stories for Monologue Mondays from other women’s journeys in a couple of weeks. In the meantime, check back next week for Monologue Monday: Courting vs. Dating).