8/13/12

Monologue Monday: Me

I want to preface this by saying that even though this post is about dating, I’m currently single and LOVING IT! My motto is when it’s supposed to happen it’ll happen, and in the mean time I’m just going to enjoy as much ‘me time’ as I possibly can.

Monologue Monday: Dating and the Single Life
Being a 27 year old virgin is pretty interesting at times. Not necessarily for reasons that you might imagine either. For me, (especially at this point in my life), my biggest challenge isn’t trying NOT to have sex or be intimate with others. My biggest obstacle is actually dating. Yes, you read right- DATING.
In the words of my ex boyfriend (he’s an ex for a reason right?!?!?), “you would make the perfect wife, but you aren’t girlfriend material”. (When I asked him why he would say something so crazy, he said it’s because I have the qualities that a guy looks for in a wife, but when you’re young you just want to have fun…not date someone who is cautious and responsible)…um yeah, did I mention that he was my ex.
But anyways, (and if ya’ll don’t mind I’m going to get fairly personal with this post), but seriously though, when it comes to dating it really is a challenge sometimes.
I’m one of those girls that loves to have a good time. Usually whenever I’m out I’m always smiling and energetic (and probably laughing like crazy). I really do enjoy life.
At the same time, I hold my beliefs and values really close to my heart and there are a lot of things that I’m just not willing to compromise on.
And this is where the challenges of dating come in to play (and why I referenced my ex earlier): I’m laid-back and relaxed enough to not take myself or life too seriously, but I’m devoted and committed to my faith enough to stand strong when sticking to my principals.
For some reason this is confusing to many of the guys that I encounter.
Some guys seem to think that if I’m happy-go-lucky with my attitude and demeanor, then I’ll be the same with my body and emotions, and that’s just so absurd to me (and confusing to them when they try me).
And I guess the second part to this is that being 27 and living on my own and having all of the freedoms that I have, they really don’t get it when I tell them the few rules that I have for myself. (I.e. no overnight stays, having somewhat of a curfew, etc).
They are usually like ‘why does a grown woman have restrictions on how she lives her life?’
Side note- if somebody says this to me I keep it moving because they obviously are not the one for me. I set limits because I’m proactive and that’s what works for me fool! (I don’t call people fools- or any type of bad name really, but this is what I’m thinking sometimes).
So needless to say there have been many times that I have just felt so discouraged with the entire process. Honestly, that’s why some might even suggest courting instead of dating (which I should get around to writing a post about one day- note to self!), but there is one thing that always brings me encouragement and that is this:
You have to stay true to yourself in life. There are going to be some guys (maybe even a lot of guys) that just don’t get you, and that’s ok.
You don’t want to compromise your standards or desires just because it doesn’t fit into someone else’s mold or idea of what they think you should be.
I’m going to keep on laughing, keep on smiling, and keep on enjoying life every chance that I get. If someone doesn’t get me then they just don’t get me- that’s ok with me.
Ultimately when I meet my special guy, he is going to accept that I don’t want to have sex before marriage. He is going to appreciate that I respect myself and my values enough to set certain limits on our interactions with one another (until marriage). And he is going to love that I am me: quirky, engaging, fun, and full of life.
In short, he is going to get me and we are going to be equally yoked and on the same page with things.
Until that time….until I meet the man that accepts me just as I am (quirks and all J), then I am content on just living life to the fullest and making the most out of every opportunity.
I might not have been “girlfriend material” for my ex, but I will be that and so much more for someone someday, and I don’t mind waiting until that time.
The best things happen unexpectedly ….
-Virgin Monologuez
P.S. Trust God and just live life…everything will happen when it should. Just relax J!

4 comments:

  1. Love your blog! You should start a YouTube channel. I can relate with what you are saying and can't wait to see your post about courting.

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  2. wow, you are so much like me that it scares me to hear you speak, I feel like there is finally someone I can relate to on this planet. This is Ms.Bronzebella91 and I just want to encourage you to keep your values and keep being a leader especially in this society that we live in. Like you said the right man will come one day only God knows. God will bless you with a wonderful husband I just know it and want you to know that due to the fact that you kept your promise to God by remaining a virgin until marriage he will really give you a prosperous and happy life. I am so proud of you, and keep being the special person you are, take care.

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  3. Hi @anonymous, thanks for the comment :)!

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  4. Hi @ Bronzebella91, your message really touched my heart; thank you. I really am genuinely so happy when people take the time out of their busy day to write me and to let me know what they are thinking. I love interacting with others. Judging from the emails that we have been sharing between each other, you seem like a really cool person and I am glad that we can relate on some of the same things. Life seems so much better when you know you aren’t alone right?!?!? (Which in essence is why this blog was created: so that we could all support each other). So please keep being the incredible person that you are, and I pray that God bless you immensely just for being you and for speaking positivity and life into the lives of others. Have a good day :)!

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I really appreciate ya'll for taking the time to comment. Tell me your thoughts, and I'll try to respond back as soon as possible. Have a good day :)